Living in this society long enough, you’ll come to realize there is a motto for every situation. When you lose a game, some will say “it’s not whether you win or lose, it’s how you played the game.” Others will tell you “winning isn’t everything; it’s the only thing.” Say what? With all of these conflicting mantras, its imperative for you to know how to define your life code.
Examples of these conflicting “mottos” exist for most of life’s situations. Those who are not careful will float through life believing every outcome is acceptable depending on what “comforting” saying they come across at that time. This leaves one inconsistent, lacking direction and unaccountability. Do you want to live a fulfilling, purposeful life? Or are you okay with eating whatever shit sandwich life feeds you simply “cause a man’s gotta’ eat”?
Life Purpose
To avoid floating through a meaningless, misguided existence, you must discover your life code. Understand what’s of importance to you, build your mission, and come to terms with what you believe you would be willing to do to achieve it. When you wake up in the morning, what gets you out of bed? Are you motivated to exercise for the purpose of “looking good for the ladies”, feeling stronger than most men, or making your body healthier so you live longer? Do you work at your job because it’s a steady paycheck, a path to bigger things, or a way to make you filthy rich?
Lacking purpose in your life’s activities will create a situation where life will fill the voids. Time will pass as you’re occupied, and eventually you’ll grow old without having fulfilled any of your childhood dreams. Life will pass you by quickly if you lack purpose, direction, and a mantra. That “code” you live by will help keep you on the path to the life you truly desire.
Code Examples
Are you the type of person who’s okay with doing anything to get ahead? If cutting corners, backstabbing, and cheating doesn’t bother you, and you plan to continue living this way, then that’s your code. “Whatever it takes”.
Do you focus more on your family life than money and social status? Does family always come first? When you make choices that puts your family ahead of all else, does it make you feel good? If so, you’re a “family is everything” guy, and that should be the code by which you build your life.
Would you describe yourself as results oriented, or do the life experiences matter more to you? Is your focus on outcome or adventure? If it’s the latter, then you’re an “enjoy the ride” kind of guy. The point is, you can find a saying applicable to any situation, and the only way to advance towards your life goal is to remain consistent with those fundamental mantras.
Sadly, people who bounce back and forth between philosophies end up being indecisive and unfulfilled. They accept the results of any situation because they find comfort in some saying that tells them their outcome is “okay”.
Tracking Life Goals
The truly strong man knows some outcomes are unacceptable. Instead of ignoring or crying over these situations, they first come to grips with the reality of their present state by comparing it with their foundational code. They accept responsibility for the results they’ve achieved, and build a plan to avoid a similar result in the future. This is how you build the life you want.
Don’t wait until you’re on your deathbed to come to grips with the reality of what you really wanted life to be. The book “The Top Five Regrets of the Dying” by Bronnie Ware examines this topic from a nurse’s point of view. According to her research, the most common regret shared by people nearing death was:
“I wish I had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.”
he Top Five Regrets of the Dying, Bronnie Ware
Accepting what you’re given instead of planning methods to take what you want is a sure fire way to a miserable, regrettable existence. Just because someone says it’s alright, doesn’t mean you should accept that. Be a man of action and live by a code which suits you. Maximize your time on this planet and stay true to yourself. The world needs strong men.
– Your Big Bro
For free life advice, contact us at Yourbigbro@enteringmanhood.com
