Rules for Life

Self Honesty Creates A Better Life

Finding time to reflect daily will keep you committed to your ideals and focused on your goals. As you sip your morning coffee, it’s a great opportunity to think about what it is you want to accomplish, and how you will get there. Before we get into the power of strategic goal setting, let’s address the 800-pound gorilla in the room (our society). The importance of embracing and being, yourself sounds like a simple concept, but few forget how to do it. Sadly, many never learned how. Self honesty, the ability to take an honest look at yourself and accept who you currently are, creates a better life.

Self Honesty Isn’t Common Today

We live in a world of Instagram posers, Twitter virtue signalers, holier than thou religious lunatics and LinkedIn con artists. Sadly, these subservient confused sheep-like adults live the lives they “think” they’re supposed to be living. Examples include white women pretending to be black (Rachel Dolezal) or Spanish (“Hilaria” Baldwin), black guys pretending to be beaten up in race-based attacks (Jussie Smollett), and technology entrepreneurs posing as scientists (Bill Gates). Hundreds of millions of people worship celebrities and attempt to model their lives after what they see on TV (or Instagram).

Not only do we allow for it to happen, but as a society we treat them like children and preach that we should accept everyone for what they “identify as”. I remember being four years old and pretending to be an astronaut at the family barbeque. All of the adults indulged me and went along with it because I was a child! Why are we embracing this lunacy from adults?

How many people out there are really and truly happy? What percentage of them are faking it on the exterior but miserable on the interior? Far too many. People dislike themselves so much that they are pretending to be something else. It’s just sad, and pathetic. I do recognize that many of you that follow my page are NOT the aforementioned people; you’re bold, confident and unapologetically masculine.

self honesty makes you stronger

The World Needs Strong Men

I firmly believe men like us should take it upon ourselves to teach and mentor other guys. Change happens one person at a time, and if we all contribute to the overall goal, we can make a true impact on society. This may not directly apply to your own self improvement, but it might assist you in helping another brother in need.

For those of you who have not experienced this awakening or transformation, I’m here to help. January first is the perfect time to begin and execute strategic goal setting for yourself. The most difficult part of this process is actually taking the time to think, analyze and identify what it is you want to improve about yourself.

Yeah, you might want to make more money, but what is it that is actually holding you back from making more money? This is the hurdle we need to figure out how to jump. Oh, you want to look better naked? Cool, but what’s currently stopping you from doing that? Is it your workout routine, diet, sleep schedule, or discipline?

See what I mean? It’s time to have an honest conversation with yourself to truly understand the root of the issue. Only then can we begin the process of improving ourselves. Accept who you are now and visualize who you want to be.

Challenge Your Ego with Self Honesty

“You are what your record says you are.” – Bill Parcells

Many times, we walk around with this preconceived notion of who we are, but what happens if that notion is inaccurate? We never learn, improve, nor evolve. If you’re unhappy with something in your life, make a plan and change it. For some reason, if you’re unable to change it, then adjust your mindset. What you decide to put into your head impacts your thoughts, feelings, mindset and mood. Take control over it today.

Once you’ve identified what’s holding you back. it’s time to put the goals down on paper. Make sure they are short term, measurable, and within your control. Saying “I want to lose 25 pounds” is a good long-term goal, but you need to build a short term plan with it’s own goals in order to get there. Try something like this:

  • Complete a minimum of three workouts per week, ranging from 30-45 minutes each
  • Cut down my caloric intake to 1,600 calories per day, and I will track this (MyFitnesssPal)
  • I will do this by eating 3 times per day, with each meal being 500-550 calories
  • Plan my meals weekly so I am never desperately scrambling to find something to eat (here’s where you build meal plan goals)
  • I won’t eat anything fried, nor drink soda. I will only allow myself one cheat day per week.
  • I am avoiding alcohol 6 days per week. On the cheat day, I will have up to two drinks maximum. These drinks will only be scotch, wine, or beer (no mixed sugary drinks)
  • Every morning after I wake up, I will weigh myself
self honesty can be challenging

Measure Your Progress

Again, make sure you write all these down on a notepad and keep it close to your bed. When you wake up every day, re-read them. Want to hold yourself even more accountable? Tell a few close friends about it, as they will keep you on track when you may be feeling weak.

Another trick? Always track your progress. I mentioned the MyFitnessPal app if health goals are your focus, but this can be done for any type of goal. Use an excel spreadsheet or a Google document to make sure you’re staying on pace.

This is how you develop a better you. Complaining, pretending, and acting like a victim hoping for sympathy won’t get you anywhere. Taking action will.

For more tips on goal setting, shoot me an email at YourBigBro@enteringmanhood.com.

-Your Big Bro

“If you want to be happy, set a goal that commands your thoughts, liberates your energy and inspires your hopes.” – Andrew Carnegie